I would never have thought so before about two weeks ago. But around that time I was voicing some stresses to God and family regarding how I spend time with my daughter, and, relatively quickly, she started behaving more demandingly than she ever had up until that point (granted, she's only about three months old, and I'm sure I'm still experiencing just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to dealing with demanding children).
My stresses had been these: What do I do with this baby? What if what I'm doing at this moment isn't the best thing for her? Should she play with her dangling toys or do some tummy time? Should I carry her around or set her down? Is the baby-wearing wrap the answer to everything or does she hate it? What if she's not developing as well as she could be? Should I play some classical music for her? What if I want to listen to some of my favorite alternative rock? Will it ruin her brain cells? Should I read her a book? Which one?
As you can imagine, my thoughts were exhausting. You're probably also thinking I'm neurotic. Well, you might be right. But let's not delve into that! Let's just say I'm highly perfectionist and sensitive to what I perceive to be potential threats (including guilt over making mistakes). I'm working on this.
Then God sent me a wonderful gift, misleadingly wrapped in just the checkout line's plastic bag, not pretty paper and ribbons. I didn't have high expectations when I first saw this package, but after opening and experiencing it, I came to appreciate its beauty.
My little girl started crying more often during the day. I hadn't changed anything for her (except all of her wet diapers), and I didn't think she was in pain or anything, but surely enough, she wasn't content. I quickly learned through desperation's trial and error the few things I could do to get her calm. Suddenly my options were limited.
Then it hit me: whatever I'm doing that's helping her not cry is the right thing to do. If she's not unhappy, then she's fine, and I should stop freaking out. I'm sure other parents have known this all along and may be laughing at me a little bit; that's okay. I'm just thankful for God's surprising answer to my prayer. He sends good gifts, and sometimes He has a sense of humor while He's at it.
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